21/11/2010-Sun, 8-9am, what a mental morning. Accidentally listened to the classic sad korean dramas ost mv last night. Back in those years, i cried watching just because they had a sad ending. Today, the feeling is totally different, depressed, yet, realise. It's been 2 weeks. 2 weeks of forcing myself to walk away from where i am standing. Saying that i need spaces, a huge space. Claiming i will keep a distance, no talking, no interaction, no eye contact just to get over my feeling on you. 1st week of trial, i thought i had succeed. Yes! I really can seeing you as a friend back. I can look you in the eyes i can talk to you just like how we talked before. Just like the beginning, we played, we fought, next, we played then fought and that best friend's stuff kept recycling until it stepped onto the second process. There go my tears for us. Fuck? Yes. We just cant deny we are still emo yet sensitve about what i've said or you've split out. Do you still love me? Keep it to yourself. Pathetic? Am I? No. Words that had been spoke out, through heart especially, is not easy to kick them out from it. One alphabet that had been kicked out, one crack was done on the heart. Common explanation. I love you? No. I just take you to my heart. When can i take you out of it? When the cracking process finished. When it doesnt feel painful anymore. Yet, i am wating these minutes passing by, patiently. And you are right though. Everything is not the same anymore. Besties, has become an unreachable term for both of us. Broken? Again? Yes. Friend and love have to walk at different paths. Regret? Yes. A classic korean drama - Sorry, I love you.

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